Old Legs Tour Angola 2024 – Day Seven
Victoria Falls – Of Bridges and Bikes and Bungees (and Kgs)
The initial reaction to our rest day was a resounding “Woo-hoo! We need it!” But on the Old Legs Tour, rest days are just days where you rest your cycling legs. The reality is, there’s a whole lot of not-very-epic cleaning and sorting to be done.
Victoria Falls is a whole different world. No passport needed, but you’d swear you’d stepped into another land. From the crack of dawn, the sounds of the bustling city start – overlaid by the constant thunderous roar of the Falls themselves, and the( rather less impressive) coughing of our wheezing crew. (The bug on tour is beginning to become more than an irritation. Our Captain, Adam, missed a fun night out at The River Brewery because he had a fever. Down with him the next day was Jaime, Laurie Watermeyer, Richard “The Caveman” Dennis, with Nick, Ant, and some of the others in recovery.) Toss in the incessant whir of helicopters and the lively soundtrack of pubs, restaurants, and tourists, and you’ve got a vibrant, pulsating atmosphere. Artistic alleyways are a treasure trove of creativity, showcasing everything from paintings and jewelry to crafts and sculptures. The town’s unique blend of small-town charm and cosmopolitan spirit is magnetic. A diverse mix of tourists, locals, and Zimbabweans from across the country converge here, creating a vibrant mix of people determined to soak in the magic that is the Falls.
Shearwater Village and Campsite is fabulous. It’s the oasis we desperately needed after our week-long odyssey through the stunning but unforgiving bush. We can’t recommend this immaculate haven highly enough. The incredible service provided by Mike Davis, Carol, Joanna, and the team was beyond compare. They were there to greet us, help us unload, clean, repack, stash, and sort through our chaotic mess, all with infectious smiles and friendly banter. Their welcoming spirit was a breath of fresh air, making us feel right at home despite our bedraggled appearance. It’s a testament to their character that they didn’t flinch at the sight of our dusty, disheveled troop invading their pristine paradise.
Rest day, as mentioned previously, is a bit of a misnomer. On arrival, we had offloaded all of the trucks so that we could send back to Harare everything we had bought in excess. After a delicious breakfast at Shearwater Village, we began the packing, sorting, and cleaning. Swift came to our rescue, and with one phone call, the super-efficient team in Victoria Falls arrived within an hour of the call. It was a great relief to get rid of so much excess weight and baggage.
Finally, we were free for the afternoon’s entertainment, we had a full gathering of friends, as well as Laurie Selby and Jess Reid, who arrived to join us on the tour. And who could forget our number one follower, Gabriella, who flew in that morning on her first solo trip to greet her mom, grandparents, and uncles at their one and only rest day?
Whilst we were waiting for the water to arrive, courtesy of ProBrands and Gain (thanks for keeping us hydrated), Gabriella took Naison off for an unforgettable experience: his first glimpse of Victoria Falls. Sitting here with us, his face still lit up with awe, Naison describes the moment as “unbelievable and cherishable”. He said that seeing it on TV just does not do it justice; having one of the World’s Wonders right in front of him was amazing. Being part of the Old Legs Tour has opened doors he never imagined, and this moment is a highlight he’ll cherish forever. Naison’s infectious smile, usually a constant companion, has now reached a whole new level of brilliance.
Then, it was off to the Victoria Falls Bridge. Of course, being Epic, we weren’t planning to just go and do a little sightseeing. That would be completely out of character. We wanted a volunteer to ride his (or her) bike off the Victoria Falls Bridge. Our resident daredevil, “Titan” Keegan, didn’t need a second invitation to volunteer (much to the relief of the rest of us). As he underwent the pre-jump measurements, we expected his heart rate to skyrocket, but his Fitbit was chilling at a leisurely 70bpm. The guy was barely awake.
Positioned at the edge, as instructed, Keegan calmly pedalled forward. As his front wheel kissed the void, defying gravity, he executed a wheelie-somersault combo before hurtling downward. As the water loomed large and he seems sure to hit it, the bungee snapped him back up in a triple backflip, narrowly missing the bridge scaffolding. On the third up, Keegan was having fun, stretching his legs out as far forward under the handlebars as he could, trying to do even more somersaults. We didn’t have a heart rate monitor on him, but he reckons it was 210, boosted by an adrenaline rush and pure exhilaration.
Next up were Jaime and Jess on a tandem gorge swing. Having literally just flown in from London, straight off the plane, jet-lagged and confused, she was an easy con. Jaime said that a tandem jump would be great for bonding and help her get into the mix straight away. Both were terrified, but Jess’ face said it all! Jaime looked as cool as a cucumber but later admitted that she was just trying to make Jess feel better; inside, she was screaming. As they stepped off the bridge, that pent-up fear erupted into screams of absolute joy (we think) and definite relief when they bounced comfortably back to safety.
Meanwhile, at the top of the bridge, Gabriella and Uncle Dave were strapping up, on the face of it, cool, calm, and collected, but every so often, their masks dropped, revealing their true nerves. Dave turned to Gabriella and said, “Don’t worry, if the rope snaps, we won’t know anyway.” Gabriella said that his words were oddly comforting, and with that, they jumped. We still don’t know whose scream it was that bounced and echoed off the gorge walls, scaring falcons, crocodiles, baboons and tourists alike. Each claimed it was the other, but at that moment, everyone left on the bridge was gripped with a terrible sense of FOMO and the bitter realisation that the daylight was now fading, and that was the last jump of the day.
Shearwater’s bungee and gorge swing are major crowd-pleasers, drawing attention from every corner of the bridge. On this particular day, a recent culinary convention brought in hundreds of delegates, all eager for selfies with us, the accidental Kardashians of the Old Legs Tour, spontaneous celebrities for no apparent reason. Even the Victoria Falls steam train and olden-day carriages had popped out to witness our team’s fun, and the highlight for Mark “Jono,” Laurie, and Alistair was to be invited up into the fire wagon to ogle at the boiler, shiny brass knobs, and the spick-and-span engine room of this early 19th-century engineering marvel, still operating precisely as it was designed.
Excited and animated, we decided now would be a good time to have the Day 7 weigh-in. For those of you who have followed us across Africa, you will know that there are two body types on Old Legs Tour: One is like Eric’s; he needs all the jelly babies a single Isuzu can carry just to maintain body weight, whilst most of the rest of us set goals for weight loss when on tour. To date (four tours later), the Selby Crew have managed only to gain weight on tour. Of course, they blame Support for feeding them too well, and now with Ant’s culinary mastery, it’s a foregone formula for failure. So it came as no shock that as each Selby stepped on the scale in turn, the weights reflected up.
At first, the scale was blamed, but then “Caveman” Dennis and Dave Scrivener stepped on, and both had lost a couple of kilograms each. The resentment moved off the scale, and dirty looks were bestowed upon them. The Watermeyers tipped the scale back into relief because they too had increased in weight, a couple of kilos each. And then, the smiling Gus confidently stepped forward, sure in the knowledge that he would have lost at least 2 kgs given the effort he had put into these rides. Horror of horrors, as he stared down at the scale, 104kg. He couldn’t believe it; he jumped off the scale in fright and stared in disbelief. He stepped on again, back to 104; he bounced, and the needle fluctuated wildly between 120 and 90 but settled again at 104. He tried everything, even raising one foot, but the stubborn scale remained resolute.
The more perceptive of us noticed his chin drop and bottom lip quiver ever so slightly, but he quickly hid it behind a huge grin and stepped off the scale, a little deflated, excuse the pun. Jaime, ever the carer, showed him the video playback, hoping he might notice a thumb, cunningly pressing down behind his heel in one corner. But it’s called Blind Panic for good reason, and all Gus could see in the playback was 104, looming large and terrifying on the little screen. As he reads this blog, Adam (and his thumb) have taken refuge, for he has been mercilessly mocking Gus for his tremendous weight gain for days and now the penny will undoubtedly drop, and Gus will seek his revenge…
The next stop was a welcome-and-farewell dinner at the internationally acclaimed River Brewery, where we were hosted by the talented and visionary partners of that excellent establishment, committed to the production of fine beer, good food, and live get-up-and-dance music. So ended Day 7, on an absolute high.
Coming up next, Days 8 & 9…stay tuned as we Have Fun. Do Good. Do Epic.
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